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Quick Update

There isn't too much happening in my life right now. I am all consumed with trying to sleep train Aryana. She is getting better. We are attempting to teach her how to self soothe so she won't depend on Ben or I to get to sleep. Her naps continue to be short, usually 45 minutes and she is inconsistent at night. Her longest stretch has been 9 hours without nursing but other nights she'll wake up every 3 hours (like last night). At least we've made progress. It's hard to believe 3 weeks ago she was sleeping in our bed and I had to hold her 24 hours a day. Now she's in her crib for naps and at night and sometimes falls asleep without crying.

She did start a new habit, sucking her tongue and lower lip. It's pretty cute but it causes her to gulp a lot so she's been spitting up quite a bit.



I love playing with Aryana and enjoying her smiles, but I am a little overwhelmed right now. We stopped giving her a bottle when Ben was really sick and now she won't take the bottle. So my freedom is very limited. Plus, I don't have a car which keeps me close to home and Aryana doesn't like going for walks so that keeps me inside. (with the exception of yesterday with grandma Linda) As everyone keeps telling me, it gets better, and it already has.

Bad Habits

When we were little Ben sucked his index finger and I sucked my thumb. When Aryana refused to take a soother she was destined to inherit one of our bad habits. At 2 months of age she started to suck on her fist. We thought as her fine motor skills developed she would choose a finger to suck on. But, no. She likes to suck on her WHOLE fist. The only thing that is changing now is she tries to fit BOTH her hands into her mouth. Really, her WHOLE fist!

In Remembrance

On May 23, 2009 Erin Porteous would have turned 28 years old. But she lost her battle with breast cancer in June last year. She was diagnosed with breast cancer only days after her 25 birthday. Fortunately, she was living in Korea at that time and she underwent surgery within weeks. Apparently breast cancer is more common in young women in Korea so they are more aggressive with treatment. If she was here in Canada it would have been months between her initial appointment and the surgery, instead it was weeks.

She returned to Winnipeg for her radiation and chemo treatments. She took all of this in stride. She was able to joke about her illness and was willing to share her experience to help others optimize their health. So if you have any concerns please see a doctor for treatment. You may be able to stop a serious problem earlier.

Around a year after her diagnosis she began to have back pain. After a bone scan she was diagnosed with bone cancer in her spine, shoulder blade and pelvis. Erin was determined to beat her illness. She went to Mexico for alternative treatments and later to Florida to the Hippocrates Health institute. The Hippocrates philosophy is dedicated to the belief that a pure enzyme-rich diet, complemented by positive thinking and non-invasive therapies, are essential elements on the path to optimum health. They focus on eating uncooked foods and taking wheat grass shots. I must admit when I saw her when she returned from Florida her skin was beautiful and her teeth were glowing white from the wheat grass. Unfortunately, the diet she followed in Florida is much harder to follow in a cold climate like Winnipeg.

She began to exercise more in Florida because she was feeling so great. She accidentally fractured her hip and required a hip replacement when she returned to Winnipeg. At this time I was fortunate to spend more time with her because she was admitted to Concordia Hospital (where I work). She seemed to experience complication after complication and even required a second surgery when her hip became infected. Through all of this, she was still the outgoing and determined Erin I knew.

Only a couple of months after her hip replacement the cancer had spread to her lungs making it difficult for her to breathe. She passed away in the comfort of her own home, surrounded by family.

My only regret it not trying to see her more often when she returned to Winnipeg. I never knew if she was getting treatments or if she was too tired/sick or when she was traveling. I called her house when she returned from Mexico. Her brother or dad answered (I can’t tell them apart) and he had to explain to me that Erin was admitted in St. Boniface Hospital with kidney failure. (Apparently it’s not uncommon for this to occur after the alternative treatments in Mexico. Sometimes the kidneys are unable to filter the medications/compounds given to people.) I felt awful because he sounded so sad. I mostly stuck to emails after that, so Erin could respond at her leisure.

Erin was a fantastic person and had an impact on my life. I think in our friendship it was true that opposites attract. Erin was so energetic and outgoing while I was content to have a couple close friends and withdrew in social situations. She helped me to become more confident because she always complimented me (and others) on my personality and talents and challenged the boundaries of my comfort zone.

She will be missed by many. But she is still alive in our hearts.

She's a Talker

Aryana has pretty much been making noise (with her voice, not crying) since she was born. At about 6 weeks old she seemed to respond when spoken too. I haven't been able to capture her talking on camera because she was too enthralled with looking at the camera to talk. Today she felt compelled to share her thoughts.

Beautiful Spring

I'm really excited that the robins have returned this year. Two summers ago I was thrilled to watch a family of robins hatch 2 separate batches of eggs. The birds did not return last year but yesterday I noticed robins flying around our front yard. They returned to the nest that is sheltered under the roof above our "flower garden". The following pictures are from summer 2007.

Mother's Day

I cannot believe that I am now included in the mother's day celebration. I wasn't even pregnant last mother's day, so I never thought about it. Now, looking at Aryana, it's hard to believe she's MINE.

I am already reaping the rewards of being a mother. Last Monday night dinner Ben's Oma was holding Aryana and Wes and Linda were doting on her, Aryana was looking around. When i walked by she looked at me and SMILED. I felt awesome.

Even though there are so many mothers, each child is a miracle. Imagine, millions of neurons, muscles, bones, organs, blood, etc. are derived from 2 half cells. After studying anatomy in depth it is incredible that a baby is equipped with everything she needs for a lifetime. It's amazing that there aren't more sick children in the world. I don't know how someone can feel a child in their tummy and witness a birth and not believe in some sort of higher power.

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Becoming a mother is also the only occupation that you can never take a break from, quit or retire. But after long hours and hard work you may get promoted to grandmother or even great-grandmother. Something I am realizing more and more each day. It was really great having my mom around after giving birth to Aryana. Especially during the weeping episodes. (Something I wish I was warned more about. So a warning to any new expecting mothers, you'll cry for no reason a couple times a day for about 2 weeks after you give birth.)

Ben took a couple pictures of me and Aryana. Since I'm usually at the business end of things I haven't been in any pictures with Aryana since the hospital.

I really enjoy our morning routine. I feed her, wash her and read her a book. Sometimes we just play. She doesn't sit still much.